Wooo

I have exactly 14 days to go before going in. & right now, i just feel like writing. This is my warning to you. This post can go on forever. But it's sad isn't it? When someone tells you that nothing last forever. Yes. It's true. There's no such thing as forever. I don't even know why that damn word exists. It should be taken out from the dictionary. The 'Global Words Federation' should do something about it. But just like the word forever, that organization doesn't doesn't exist. It was made up by me. At least I don't give false hope do it? The word forever just totally emits a whole quantity of false hope. The bastard who created it deserves to have a ten thousand kilogram truck placed on his ass. He will die almost immediately but the pain would certainly make it feel like forever although it was just a second or two. Hold your horses. Could it be that everybody's definition of forever is different? Okay. The official definition is, ...

Can it get any closer than this? Well I would say it is close if she had transferred to my attraction. But beggars can't be choosers right? I mean I'm the beggar. She chose to go to far far away. It's not as far as you think though. It's just like 400 metres away from Madagascar. Try explaining that to an archeologist someday. He'll tell you how stupid you sound. So this, changes everything. What does it change? I'll tell you what it changes. Everything. I don't know what else to do. I wanna let go but my brain is telling me not to. Just yet. & I don't know, I have this feeling of some sort. The kind where you will succeed if you try. I don't get that often just so you know. Cuz usually, I either fail in every attempt or I just don't try at all. The few times I had this feeling, I won a nokia phone & got 100 marks for a maths paper. There are more but those aforementioned two are the more significant moments. You wouldn't wanna hear a...

I'm a real loser aren't I? I quit my job just because a girl rejected me. Yes, she may be far away from my allocated location but you can never not see people at that place. I'm sure there will come a time when we will awkwardly meet at the lift or wardrobe area. Yeah. That's why I quit. I simply cannot experience such things. I think for the past few years, I've been too relaxed. I remember someone telling me in life, we need to relax. But just look at my record for the past 6 years. Even that bastard will be astonished. He will then go, "WTF is wrong with you!!?" In Malay of course. He told me his belief in Malay when I was in secondary 4. So, why am I writing all this? Well, i want you to be the first to know. That a new & improved x100 me is on it's way to feel sunlight. To grace the earth. Tomorrow, this nightmare life of recently will be nothing more than a distant memory. A memory worth keeping just to make for a good story to tell the kids ...

The last time I won movie tickets, it was 5 years ago. I was still an immature bastard who's juvenilism destroyed his own heart. I can't say I've grown. I'm mature now. Or at least more mature. Yes mentally. But the one thing that remains the same is my inability to do what my heart wants me to do. It's usually left broken because of girls. No. Its actually me. I break my own heart you see. Because of my inability. But the good thing about a heartbreak is that it reassures me I have a heart. As always though, someone's gotta take the blame for my failures. I blame him. I can't compete with all his damn ideas. That's why she'd rather choose him than me. It's natural. I think all the girls in this world are programmed in this way. I must have done something real bad in my last life. So bad that someone who's still bearing that grudge is making my life really miserable by depriving me of something I've been wanting my whole life. & I...

I'm quitting. The job. That I've held for a year & a half. I never thought I'd last this long on a job. It's a miracle in fact. Shit. A miracle has happened in my life. I've always wanted a miracle to happen in a situation that involves a girl. Now, the lifeline has been used. & I only noticed it now. No wonder nothing seems to happen these days. I feel like buying another one. Who's putting it up for sale? If it's up for grabs I'd offer you a handsome amount. If you'd like, maybe a pretty amount. How bout a cute amount? Don't they all sound attractive? Wooo. As i have told you, the reason I held to this damn job for a few months more is because of her. I've been exploring the possibilities & the scenarios. So far, all I've done is mess things up. The sheer thrill of messing up is not with me anymore. Not when it comes to matters of the heart. I thought something could happen. It was wishful thinking. But now, I can quit easy....

I've been saying I can quit cigarettes anytime. So why do I smoke. Stay tuned to know the answer. Even on your loneliest of days, cigarettes will be there for you. What more can I say? Some of my friends think I'm a social smoker. But why the hell does that term even exist? It's stupid to smoke socially. Someone smokes, you follow. You wanna know her better, you take one of her sticks. It's not wrong. But it's just dumb. I do admit that in the past, cigarettes have helped me make friends. Girls even. But I don't really fall for smoking girls. Unless, they have a good reason as to why they smoke. Like 'it's fun' or 'its cool' or 'I have too much money' & so on. Now, from the day I first started smoking, I built this mentality. Its sorta like a believe. That cigarettes will never have any addictive effect on me. Till now, I still have one foot over it. I don't succumb to temptations, if any. People can say all they want. That sm...

All my life, I've always wanted to be a singer songwriter. I mean I am now. Just without recognition. So, that pretty much is as good as talking without any voice coming out. Mutes would know what I'm talking about. It's pointless. There are always hidden agendas when the government gives us money. I mean why would they do that? All they do is take money from the citizens. It's not that I don't appreciate the $600. I just want more. Maybe like twenty thousand? Every year? Try telling those bitches how my eligibility to vote doesn't make me a mature man. I've waited all my life for this. Not to vote. But to be given the rights to vote. I feel great. Great enough that I'm having this 'nothing is impossible' vibe flowing all over my body making me believe that I can get to her if I try. That's if I try. I'm usually okay with just dreaming about how it would be so I'm good. But once in a while, accomplishing a feat that nobody thinks you ...