Wooo

I think countdowns are okay. Not good, not bad but okay. Just okay. Well the reason it's not good is because it's the start to a new year. How is counting down to that be considered good? It's unwelcomed. You dont welcome the unwelcomed. It's like waiting to welcome a stranger or an unknown to go in your house. You countdown the time to that moment. Well I don't mind if the stranger's a pretty lady. But you know how those pretty & strange ladies are. They're most likely to be evil. Or they're old sorcerers in disguise. But I also don't really mind if that stranger is good at playing Pro Evolution Soccer on the xbox. I've been looking for my match for quite sometime now. It's hard being a pro. Everything is too easy. So a stranger turning out to be a tough opponent is actually welcomed to my house. Do take note of that, strangers reading this. Even if you're a hobo & you reek of skunk. You can versus me but maybe just for a match. ...

I may not celebrate Christmas but it doesn't mean I can't enjoy it. & when your work place is blasting those carols out loud, you can't help but feel festive even though the weather leaves alot to be desired. Those Americans who come to USS would know what I'm talking about. They celebrate authentic Christmas in their country. So, a sweaty Christmas is probably too weird for them. But who cares. They're the ones who stupidly came here. You know it's Christmas when you hear the cleaners belting out christmas carols in Chinese. Somebody should tell the her though that there is no Christmas song in Chinese. Yet. Or maybe she was just singing for the new year, I don't know. But what I do know is that there was real passion in the singing. You can see she was more into that than cleaning which is her job. She was risking her job there being all festive. I wonder if she knew that it's Christmas tomorrow not Chinese new year. I haven't felt the strong C...

No matter how hard I practice this, I can never seem to win. & I do mean in the arcade. On my phone, I'm the champion like no other. Because no other has tried it on my phone yet. I'm not gonna let people train on my phone & then steal my ps3. Although I have doubts about whether those ps3s & mobile phones are actually win-able. Cos it seems as though the machine is programmed not to let human beings win. Countless times, after the minor prize level, I slipped up. If had taken the minor prizes instead of trying on for the major prizes, I reckon I could have opened a novelty store by now. Yeah. That's how crazy I am. But you know I don't give up easily. That's why I go on & on & on. Yeap. I give up only when there is absolutely no hope. Yea. When my money runs out. So, I came up with an idea so great, you might find it hard not calling me Einstein. I plan on going to an arcade on my pay day & make sure never to leave before I win the ps3. Or a...

Its kinda funny. When you have no interest in life anymore. You just move along with time as it goes. & time really does pass faster. Yea. It's because you don't have anything to think about so all you do Is concentrate on what you're doing at the moment & everything will be smooth sailing. You should give it a shot. I had a shot last night. A goodbye shot of sparkling blueberry. & I thought it was farewell champagne at first. Speaking of shots, I just realize young girls are starting to wear short shorts too. Some as young as 15? What is this world coming to? An end that is. Well, at that age, I would say I was very much mature & have something that most kids don't have when they're 15. A brain. Yep. But what's in the brain is a different thing altogether. So let's not go there. Yet. I don't know. I guess these girls don't really realize the danger of street urchins who fertilizes females for fun. They call it a hobby. Well I call it...

It's kinda good to know that there are still attractive girls out there who are single. Yes. Without a man. I always thought that pretty & sophisticated girls are all born with a man. I'm glad she's proven me wrong. But still, I think it's just a matter of time. Before someone knocks on her door & asks if she's home. Stupid question but one that might actually get him into her pants. I know, it's sad. I'm weeping right now agonizingly. But what can I do. I can't even start by knocking on her door or even ask her where her door is. So, I kinda deserve it. Thanks for agreeing. I should start changing the way that I blog. People tell me that the way I blog is weird. People usually blog about their daily lives & happenings. But I tend to write about stuffs that people care about & subjects that aren't possible to blog. But yeah, that's me. I'm not self centered or self absorbed. I think about others before I do anything. Before I ...

It's November! Yeah. Exactly what I said when I first realized it. "WHAT!" November's a tough month. It has always been this way. I don't know about others but yeah, it is for me. Someone once told me to get through November, you just have pretend it's October. So by the end of it, it'll be December. & by the end of December, you'll just have to go through the same shit you've been doing the past years. It's the 12 months never ending cycle. You think it'll be over after 12 months. But another 12 months come right after that 12 months. & good God, it's already gonna be the end of November. See, it works. I keep thinking It's still October. That's why I didn't realize the month with the longest day of the year is coming. & I'm only blogging for the month of November now. Cuz I thought it's still October & I've written quite alot for October. I know. I'm so crafty, I keep surprising myself. My m...

Ever since she left, I haven't had a motivation to wake up in the morning to go to work anymore. I know it's no big deal since I only work twice a week but I'd always get excited on those days. It was a good sign. I was actually looking forward to working. Cuz 5 days of motivationless school days were more than enough. & on days she was on off, I really did not feel like going to work at all. So I didn't go. It's been 3 months now. I kinda still feel the emptiness in my heart. I certainly have no idea why I asked to convert to a part timer. My brain must have fell asleep at that time. Nothing new actually. I'm surely gonna get fired soon. Well I asked for it. This lack of sleep's gonna be the death of me one day. I'll probably either die naturally because of sleep deprivation or I'll die of concussion because I fell asleep while walking & fall into a manhole head first. If only she's still around. I'd be wide awake at all times around...

I'm feeling proud of myself right now. It's not always that I feel this feeling. Well I was proud of myself when I managed to take a bottle of lubricating oil out of cheers without being caught. I was also equally proud when I managed to spray my name with gravity on a HDB wall although it would have been even better carving my name on a bathroom wall. & how bout this then. I managed reach twenty without having a single tattoo imprinted anywhere on my body. Those achievements as you can see are minor & juvenile achievements. These days, my achievements are more mature & highly rated. Okay. I kinda sound like a self-absorbed, self centered bitch right now. But now I know why they(bitches) do that. It feels great making myself greater than I really am. I think they should teach exaggerating in school. The world might turn to be a very sad place but it's such an awesome skill/attribute to posses. Ever since I started Higher Nitec, I've managed to do the unthink...

Alot of people's been talking about the ominous 10/10/10 which is today, especially my friends on facebook with the statuses & all so, I might as well write about it. People talked about the very unlucky date 4 years ago which was the 6th of June 2006 & said how an apocalypse of some sort might happen. A small one which wont wipe out the human race but big enough to create a chaos. They, or we, also had an issue on how the 07/07/07 might turn out to be the most lucky day ever In the history of forever. Scientists also made a big deal of 09/09/09. Okay that was just me. & my buddy. We talked about my birthday. & exam date which conveniently fell on that very day. But i can say we're sort of like scientists too so the aforementioned sentence does carry some weight & significance. Back to where it we were. Where were we? Oh yeah. The stupidity of auspicious thinking. No apocalypse happened on the oh 6. No miraculous winning spree happened for any gamblers on ...

October's gonna be a good month. That's what my pet bat told me last week. Through supersonic soundwaves. Before it made itself scarce forever. Haven't seen him since then. But who am I to be skeptical of his(it has balls. i accidentally caught a glimpse of it a fortnight ago when it flew over me wearing nothing) words? Or soundwaves? I'm just a singer. She's the world. & he's(pet bat) a homosexual. So the math my man. September was okay. But just. October's kinda looking promising. Major life turning events seems to be happening on the 10th month of 2010. To start things off, there are 4 family members of mine who'll be celebrating their birthdays this month. I know it's not a big deal but it is to them so I'll just give it the benefit of the doubt. This is a big deal though without a doubt. Pro Evolution Soccer 2011 comes out on October the 19th! Yeah. I'm really looking forward to it. It's like Hari Raya coming early, only more mea...

I wrote a song about her, name it after her, listen to it every night before going to sleep & dream about her. I guess she'll just never know. Why should she care? If I had any balls at all, I'd tell her. But not in a creepy way though. Well you can't blame me. I have a knack of not sharing my inner most thoughts with people I'm not close with. I'm not sure if that's a trust issue but yeah, I've been doing that or not doing that ever since I first managed to come up with inner thoughts. It's strange but I'm sure you've heard of stranger things. Like plugging a USB cable to your belly button. With the belief that you'll be able to download your self into the computer. My friend believes in that. I just said 'of course'. On an entirely different note though, I bought a new lighter today. It has a flashlight & it glows whenever I click it. I know. It's cool. Yeah. Everytime I buy a lighter, I pledge to use it till the day I d...

I'm kinda stoked about winning a pair of tickets to the 'The Album Leaf' show tonight even though I have no idea who they are. Cuz the more important thing is, this good luck streak of 0909 continues. Maybe, just maybe, this might be the right time to ask her out. Or maybe something smaller, text her or msn with her & confess what I've been storing inside all this while. I don't know. Maybe this might be a one off thingy but I don't remember the 10th of last year being shitty. Besides, God is on my side now since Hari Raya is a few hours away. Perhaps, the good deeds I have been doing in recent years to reimburse for the the juvenile times have finally been recognized by Him. Or maybe, whatever it is He has been reserving for me is now being shown to me in phases so that I'll continue to be a good soul & be rewarded with the grand prize in the coming years as it is a sign of things to come. I'm a patient person so I'm okay with the wait. But ...

I think I've said it before but i have no obligations to say it again. I've grown too old to remember the significance of birthdays. Well the way i see it, I grow a year older at the turn of the year since it's a new year. I don't suddenly turn older on a specific day. If you're meant to be mature, you will be at some point of your life & it does not occur on your birthday. When is everybody gonna see that? I don't know maybe it's the pre 21st syndrome thats making me utter spiteful words but yes, it's gonna be the same even when I turn 46. & I'm gonna be 22 in 3 months time. It's awesome. The truth is, there's no real difference being 21 from being 20. Or 19. I still can't develop the attributes of an adult. I still laugh at peoples misfortune, I still thrive on other peoples misery & I definitely still think I can survive with just working once a week. Well, I for one think that it doesn't matter if I'm a late bloome...

When you have nothing to lose, you know you will win no matter what. That is a very inspirational line. But I only apply it when I play pokemon. I mean what else can I apply that to? With the release of the much awaited & anticipated Pokemon Black & White, the kid inside me lurks out of the shadows. Wait, what now? Since when did he hide? Ever since i started playing the pokemon yellow version, I've never found another role-playing game that's more fun or as fun as it. The truth is, no one actually tries to catch 'em all when they play the game. Only a seriously psycho kid would do that. Cuz winners like me, we beat the gym leaders & the elite 4 & or course, our assholic rival who more often than not appears out of nowhere when our pokemon party's life gauge is lower than the lowest low. Notice how I labelled my self as a winner? Yeah. That doesn't happen much. Or at all even. I'm pretty just a winner when it comes to video games. But I'm no...

I've never been to a concert or a show before so I don't have anything to compare this to. But I gotta say, Ryan Cabrera was amazing. Ever since I first saw him in the music video of 'On the way down' in 2004, I've always wanted to make my hair like his. Cuz it's perfect. & how can it not be when he uses a whole bottle of wax to style it every single time. That's what he confessed to a few years back. I'm not rich enough to be able to do that. Besides, my hair will never obey my wishes anyways. Everytime I want it to stand, it will lie down. Everytime I want it to be straight when it's long, it curls itself hopelessly like me when I sleep at night. But it's not just the hair. His music has always been inspirational. Last night, or a few hours ago, he talked about each & everyone of his songs before playing them. I was moved when he talked about the song 'true' before playing it. He told us he wrote the song for a girl whom he can ...

I never realize how lucky I am living the life I'm living. I thought the pain I always go through is incomparable because it's the matter of the heart. It's complexness & perplexness may be what makes it something else but i don't believe you can compare it to the other kinds of pain in this world. I did not know about it before this because I couldn't care less. To know about it. But now I think its because of my ignorance attitude that took me away from the evil world of reality. At times, it's a bliss. Because I live in my own little world daydreaming & pretending, without having a care in the world. But I guess I'm just running away from the inevitable. I knew that I have to snap out of this attitude soon as I'm no longer a kid. I need to have a sense of responsibility. My problem, since young, is that I don't like to know the outcome of whatever I do fearing that it won't go accordingly. I still do. I don't like to face the conse...

I started a blog because of this very reason. I'm too lazy to keep a diary. A diary is perhaps better than a blog because you can actually feel it. Not only emotionally but physically too. For a blog, you can't touch the words that were written. I know nobody does that. I don't too. Only because i don't have a diary. I love writing. Writing is fun. Taxing perhaps but it's a good workout. The problem is though, not many people can understand what I write with a pen. Or a pencil. They say my handwriting is incomparable. Only because there's nothing it can be compared to. It's the worst thing on earth. So, I wouldn't want to keep a diary that might be unreadable even by myself. Cuz most of the things I write & will be writing in future are memories that i want to remember forever but might forget one day. But then again, if it's too significant I won't forget it will I? Since it's forgettable, it's not much of a memorable memory then rig...

As I browse through my blog & read the old posts, I realized something. I'm no longer the man I use to be. I started blogging for one purpose only. To record down the good old days & read it when I'm 60. I guess it won't be going as planned. First of all, I won't live till sixty because I will either die naturally before I turn 40 or I will die due to the apocalypse that will strike the world on 23th of December 2012. I don't know according to which time zone it will follow though. But what I do know is that it won't be like the movie 2012 where there are survivors. No one will be an exception on judgement day. John Connor knows what I'm talking about. Even someone as great as him didn't survive the onslaught of judgement day. The thing is, we might not be around long enough to see Christian bale die in the movie. I believe we'll be done after terminator 5.  Secondly, I no longer do stuffs that are worth writing home about or for this case, b...

If I knew the day was gonna turn out suckish, I would have turned around & walked back home from the train station in the morning & not look back. I thought that was kind of a sign of things to come. But I was defiant still. Because all that mattered was her. Being searched & checked by the mrt polices is something of a myth. But it happened to me. I was of course surprised that they do spot-checks on passerbys. I was just about to tap in when the three musketeers stopped me. They asked me to stand aside. I panicked. Usually I go into panic mode only when I do something bad or wrong. & this time, it was no exception. I had a pack of contraband cigarettes in my pocket. I brought them to break fast cuz I hate food. Yeah. So, when they asked to check my bag, I thought I was off the hook thinking they're only gonna check my bag only. But when this officer Benny asked to empty my pockets, I felt like pulling out the gun from his bolster & shoot everyone in sight. But...

I haven't had ice cream for almost a year now. But I'm sure that's not the reason why I'm turning into a manic-depressive. Although the lack of ice combined with the sweltering heat of the recent weather may have caused my brain to overheat thus making me crazier than I already am, as though I'm not crazy enough. I must be the most pathetic man on earth, if you can see me now. Everytime I fall for someone, nobody catches me as I lay on the ground flat on my face, staying there forever. I don't get easily attracted or infatuated by girls but when i get to like one of the awesomely unique 5% of the girls population on earth, I can turn into the worst wreck in the history of wrecks & shipwrecks. I don't know why I'm too afraid to try. You can ask me to try anything stupid or dangerous & I'll do it without hesitation. But when it comes to wooing a nice girl, which is probably one of the easiest or at least the least dangerous of things to do, I c...

As much as I am happy with just looking to the future, I kinda have to live in the present till that day comes. 22 days may not seem long but right now, it is to me. They say a year can go by in a blink of an eye. I've been blinking both eyes over nine thousand times & not even an hour has passed by. I guess it's inevitable really. I was asking for it. I know what I'm like. I kinda like to bend the rules a little but I mean no harm. & there certainly was no harm at all in what I did that prompted one of my work place managers to want to terminate me. If he was a terminator, I'd gladly accept my fate & die in his clutches. But he's not even in charge of me so I'm not backing down. I love working at that place. I don't ever wanna leave my job there. I wanna get married there with the one i love, who is working there but isnt aware of the my admiration for her, & have crazily hyper active themepark loving kids & take the rides together as a ...

I just realize that I haven't posted an entry for July SO!, I'm gonna take  sometime off my busy schedule & do what I was born to do. Write.       I think we all know it is long overdue. No one in Singapore really made an effort to bring him here. I have no idea why. Still, I gotta thank TAB for bringing my idol to my homeland even though I don't know whether they are a club or a diner or neither.  None of my friends like the C man. Im really stumped as to why. He's simply one if the best musicians of our generation. His songs are magic. Its as though they were weav-en(weaved) by a magic wand. Ok. I'm sure he used a pencil when he wrote them. Regardless of that, they are absolutely inspiring, monumental, meaningful & fantastic. They're definitely better than those r&b & hiphop shits. But I don't know why teens still like those dirty & ridiculous songs. Those kind of songs are normally about drugs, sex, dirty love & more inappropriate ...

It's so hard being dependent on people. I wish I have the ability to go through life's tests on my own, whatever the test maybe. As always, my plans didn't go accordingly. The damn cock up really ruined alot. How was I suppose to know I had to give the government my bank account number? Shouldn't they find it out themselves? Where's the sincerity?& who says just because I'm not 21, I don't contribute to the society? I maybe a burden to society but I believe I've contributed to it's well being ever since i was borned. Okay maybe I was exagerrating. I did more harm than good. But at least I contributed. I wonder who the hell came up with the rule. 21 to receive the gst offset. I missed like 800 dollars. That asswipe must have had a sad childhood. So I guess the ps3 has to be put aside for now. My one week of agonizing plan can't be accompanied by video games it seems. I even planned to skip work this whole week. Looks like I have to go back on ...

I got a shock, that would put all shocks to shame, today. It was the most shocking shock ever. No other shocks can top it. Not even pikachu's 10 million volts thundershock. Just when you thought you would be wrong, because you're always wrong & never right, you guessed it right. That feeling sucks. Who would have thought I would be right? & I was just giving a wild guess. Fuck my stupid life. Nothing ever goes my way. When it does, it goes right by me. Sometimes, it even bangs me out of the way. I guess I won't be seeing her again then. Plan ruined. I never should have planned. Again I curse myself for planning. It always end up hurting me. If I ever wanna see her again, I guess the only way is to wait for her at the MRT station near her house. But looking at how great life has been treating me, I'll probably miss her when she reaches. I could wait till midnight & I'm sure I'll never see her. Our paths won't ever cross. I heard a good way to get...

With everything going smoothly, I guess I should make plans now. Although nothing goes to plan. But next week, once I get enough dinero, I'm gonna get my ps3 console & spend the week behind closed doors. I'm gonna off my phone too just in case someone interrupts me when I'm playstationing or if someone from work calls me to replace them or there's last minute testing. If all goes well, I might even give myself an extra week of holiday while everyone makes their way back to school. I can't be bothered anymore. Maybe it's just an excuse. So that I won't have to try. & get her. It's actually a good way to drown your sorrows. 24/7 straight gaming. I remember when I first got my xbox console. I played for 20 hours straight. I didn't managed to get 24 because of my parents intervention. But for the whole week, it was just starwars & pro evolution soccer plus macdonalds in between & that didn't go well with my body. When it was too much...

So, I'll probably get a chance next week. But as you know, me & chances, we dont get along. We are like different magnet poles. I'm the positive pole while it is the negative. Okay maybe I'm being biase here. I'm perhaps the negative bastard. Chance here is probably the positive dude. Cuz im never optimistic about my chances. But then again, for the 2 millionth time, im saying it again, it's not a chance if you don't take it. It's funny. Yes. But I keep spurning those 'not' chances. When will the 'real' chance come my way? I wouldn't know even if it bit me on the nose. Maybe I'm just not a clinical finisher. Being the opportunist that I am, it's surprising really that I can't make the most of my chances. It always pass me by. I'm sure one day, it will come a time when all the opportunities dry up & I would be left lying on the road with my face down. I'm starting to like working at where I'm working right ...

I don't know what's wrong with me. Am I an alien? Or a robot? Or an unknown species from the thirdly fourth dimension? I don't know. I cant get the girl i like, I don't eat cheese & I don't like clubbing. Even the aforementioned things above have achieved some of those things mentioned. For the first time ever, I decided to give clubbing a shot & guess what, I didn't enjoy a single moment of it. I know guys should be excited & turned on at the thought of rubbing shoulders or to be more precise, private parts with high on girls who are on cloud nine elation. But just the sight of it, seeing other people doing it, turns me off. I can't believe those girls can be so easily caressed. They let guys all over them like it's their children who are seeking for attention. Im not really okay with that but I guess it's nothing new for those ladies. When I saw my friends doing it, I was flabbergasted. One even have a girlfriend already yet he's s...

Even though I've quit my hobby of 'deep thinking while smoking' at my balcony porch at nights, I still can't get an early nights sleep. When I was still doing that, my friends said that I couldn't fall asleep because nicotine intake before sleeping will keep you awake. Now, I find that theory to be a little bit of a bullshit crap. Because, I think the problem doesn't lie with the cigarettes but the deep thinking. Now, I don't smoke anymore at nights but my eyelids won't shut. I believe it's because I still do the deep thinking, only this time, on my bed. Hours pass by very fast. I'm not sure why but I think God speeds up the time at nights. I wish He would do it for the day time too. Back in the old smoking days, I'd would sometimes be acommpanied by emo songs. That would prompt the deep thinking which would last for a million years. If my cigarette burns off first before I finish pondering on life, my love life especially, I would take anoth...

Can it be more obvious? So far, the favorites or the contenders of the world cup has flopped. France still being shity ever since they won euro 2000, England still can't find a goalkeeper who won't make high profile blunders & Argentina who won slenderly & still very much unconvincing needing a defender to score when they have an array of great strikers. Germany are always underrated & their chances are always played down. But such a convincing opening win would only serve as a reminder to the critics they that they are among the elites. I remember 5 years ago in the confederations cup, Germany played Australia & just narrowly beating them 4-3. It was their first competitive game under jurgen klinsmann. That was the dawn of a new era. Their attack was impressive but the backline isn't. Australia, led by john aloisi in attack, keep coming back with their great determination equalizing every single goal. But Germany still triumped. They went out at the semis t...